Listen, I ain’t that drunk and I just got back from a concert that peaked at “okay.” I don’t know how to process that. I’m in a mood. I’m also devouring a sleeve of Ritz crackers and leftover salami because standards are the last thing from my mind, and also I drank enough booze where this is necessary or I’ll be hungover tomorrow. No one tells you about that when you first start up with whiskey; it’s just something you learn over time. You placate the beast or you suffer the consequences. These crackers are my virgins, and my mouth is a volcano.
Gettin’ all sorts of not laid tonight!
Also worth noting is that I don’t like that I hate everything, okay? I can’t control it. I take no joy in it unless it’s a shitty Top Cow book or The Flash. I’d prefer to enjoy things because that makes the experience worthwhile, and also that opening band fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucking sucked. Goddamn. Like instrumentally fine. I can maybe dig it as a poor man’s ripoff of In This Moment without the talent. But they were edgier than Batman jerking off on a corpse. Don’t. Do. That.
Now, onto comics!
Plastic #2
This comic is delightfully twisted. I kind of love it, even though it’s hard to read at points because I have no idea how the fucked up sociopath crazy person (who probably jerks off to plastic wrap) will act next. It’s one of the few times I’ll cringe in a good way. It’s also kind of charming? I don’t get it either, but I’m on board. There’s no end goal in sight, but that’s fine. I’ll ride this bumpy ride wherever it wants to go.
Rat Queens V2 #3
I want to like this comic more than I do, but as it stands, I still like it. The humor hits well, the swearing is on point–yes that’s a fucking art style you commoner piece of shit–and the blonde thief chick is awesome. When the Queens are interacting, it’s great, but when it diverges a bit into the serious, it starts to fall apart. Right now there are cults, and I just don’t think this can tonally handle religion. I hope I’m wrong though.
Wonder Woman #23
Okay, so I missed like half of this series so shame on me, but is this really the best way to end this plot arc? I’m pretty sure it fucking isn’t. “I love you.” “I am defeated!” Fuck off with that. I’d fall back on the artwork, but it’s honestly subar as hell this go around, which is strange since this comic normally looks amazing. I’m not sure if this is a rushed job or a bunch of problems coming together at a bad time, but endings are not the parts you want to skimp on. There are two issues left, so maybe this’ll work itself out, but right now I’m pretty disappointed. Thankfully some of the monster design is solid.
Deadly Class #28
The coloring on the first like six or seven pages is phenomenal. Some of the best I’ve seen this year. The rest is confusing as shit because I started with issue #21 or something and the comic really wishes I hadn’t. It’s not bad–far from it–but I’m ill equipped to say much more. Other than it’s bloated. I’ll say that. This one crams too much into too little space. The dialogue flows well enough to mask it I guess, but I’m still commenting on it so I guess it only half masks it. It’s like the Phantom of the Opera but with more killing and blood. I’ve never seen Phantom of the Opera so maybe that was a shitty comparison.
Black Hammer #9
Too much focus on the past bits and not enough on the fact that Talky Walky is fucking dead. It’s the worst kind of cocktease in that I didn’t cum and also it wasn’t as interesting as it should have been.
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic #54
Cute art, fun premise, rushed ending. It’s basically every MLP comic ever. (But seriously though, fucking adorable as fuck artwork. Goddamn.)
