The world is a topsy-turvey fucking mess, and clearly the best evidence for that is: I’m doing a Quick Reviews of Stupid Comics the day before it goes up, sober, and with forethought. I don’t think anything could have prepared anyone for this. Nope, nothing. Full stop. Fuller stop. Netflix picked up the rights to Full Stop and is doing a sequel called Fuller Stop with the same actors but they’re all old and no one cares anymore, but nostalgia means we will all watch that show.
The sequel will be called Fullest Stop and that is where it will indeed stop.
It’ll also be the thing that awakens Azathoth. Well, more like it’ll trip up one of the flooters who will play a major instead of a minor and off we go. It was nice knowing you.
Now, onto comics!
Batman: Metal #1
I hate everything about this book. I might hate everything about Batman. There’s an essay there somewhere, but the quick-n-dirty is Batman: Metal #1 is at odds with itself to such an insane degree that I’m not sure how I’m supposed to process it. Half of it wants to be funny, zany comic book bullshit with the Justice League getting their own Voltron, and the other half is this dark, moody affair with Batman obsessing over this prophecy thing about how he’ll end the world. The two do not mesh. Alongside that is some awful, awful dialogue–much of it filler so we don’t forget that the Justice League are here–that jumps between inane and exposition. What’s the point of having two one-shot exposition dumps if we’re going to just retread all of that information? Oh, and throwing Sandman into this doesn’t make it good; it just makes it a bad book with a civilian casualty.
I Hate Fairyland #15
Oh Scottie Young, you are still the best kind of insane. Now to be fair, this issue of IHF is odd as hell in that Gert is bespelled into being nice, so the humor doesn’t come from her but from everyone else. Half of Fairyland wants to see her fuck right the hell off, and the other half wants to murder her for her crimes. There are fewer jokes than normal, but the ones that land are top notch, and Scottie showing some of the consequences to Gert being an awful human being are nice to see. It reads like a more “mature” issue, assuming that bullshit statement means anything.
Astro City #46
Busiek is great. He does great storytelling with great characters and great ideas. I like him. I wish he’d write more Autumnlands, but hey, I’ll take what I can get. Astro City #46 continues from where we left off, though in a way that’s a bit unsatisfying. Glamorex is gone. However, she’s replaced with our dear narrator, who is pretty cool and who also has a very interesting story to tell. It gets dark in a cosmic horror sort of way, and then it gets kind of meta. I like it though! Also, the artwork is great with some truly spectacular coloring. This book is pretty. Yeah. Pretty great! Nailed it.
Wonder Woman #28
I’m still not entirely sold on the new creative team behind Wonder Woman, but credit where it’s do, they get the character. There’s so much heart to Diana, so much to latch onto and enjoy, that it’s hard to not like this book, even if the actual plotting is messy. I really wish half the plot threads would go away just so the team could meander with the character. Every time they head towards an idea I like–PTSD in super heroes, super heroes contemplating mortality, super heroes on leave–they force themselves back in a more standard comic-book direction. It’s less frustrating and more disappointing. That being said, the character work is worth it if you’re a Wonder Woman fan, and the artwork is pretty great.
Genius Cartel #1
Holy shit Top Cow put out a book that’s actually competent! Maybe even almost good! It runs some typical Top Cow bullshit, where the main character is half a Mary Sue and her flaws are only portrayed as badass instead of flaws, but the world building is cool and the plot is fairly gripping. I’m honestly planning on reading the next issue, and not in a “hate read” sort of way. I want to see where this goes.
Kill the Minotaur #3
I’m always excited to read the next issue of Kill the Minotaur and then always disappointed at how competent it is. The story is fine; the writing is mostly fine, and the artwork is fine. Sometimes one or the other peaks a bit, but on the whole, this comic really doesn’t do anything special other than exist. That being said, there are good ideas to be found (there’s a wall of sculpted bodies that bleed when touched, for example), and I do like the cat-and-mouse chase going on. And the comic handles the maze and Minotaur extremely well. I’ll be back for the next one, though I imagine I’ll feel the same way about #4 as I do about #3.
Mage Hero Denied #1
It says a lot about this book that there’s already merch for it advertised in the back matter. Buy the t-shirt and the action figures! It’s the generic kind of urban fantasy that, while fine, won’t ever rise above the sum of its parts. Some of the dialogue is spotty, the exposition isn’t always handled well, but the monster design is cool and the family dynamic between the mage and his … family feels like a new twist to the genre. Usually it’s lone rogues in these kinds of stories. I didn’t hate it, and there are things to like, but I’ll probably forget I read this book by the time issue #2 is out.
